Fork in the Road. . .

Tis So Sweet To Trust In Jesus ~ Arrangement by Piano & Cello Duo
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My husband and I love taking day trips, especially in the rolling countryside, on a sunny Sunday afternoon. It, therefore, goes without saying that we will often come across many forks in the road not knowing which path to take. Nevertheless, regardless of which road we choose to explore, we are seldom disappointed. The unexpected forks in the road, with their twists and turns, as well as ups and downs, have uncovered delightful discoveries along the way. Such as a majestic, fieldstone farmhouse set high upon a hill as it overlooks the variegated, quilt-patched meadow with the glorious grandeur of the three-tiered, white painted paddocks that seem to roam for acres, which are the playground to many mares and their foals, or the lush, green pastures by a rugged riverbank where the gentle stream flows while a small flock of sheep are grazing.  Our journey together, needless to say, has most certainly never been boring!         

Life, itself, also has many forks in the road – it twists and turns, there are ups and downs, good times and sad times, as well as smooth bumps and rough bumps, too. In fact, I do not know of one single person who has not experienced some kind of fork in the road throughout their life’s journey. However, what I have learned throughout the course of my life is that I must:

1)      Choose what my reaction will be to all circumstances in my life. I have the freedom of choice.  Life is all about change. Therefore, my choice in attitude will determine the outcome of the changes in my life. As Charles Swindoll, a great inspirational minister, once said, “We cannot change the inevitable.  The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude.”

2)      Accept what changes have, are, or will be affecting my life’s journey. When a loss occurs, as in the case of one’s health condition, there most certainly is a time to grieve and it must run its course. However, in order to move beyond the grief, I must accept that the changes that needed to occur in my life to make me well again will also enable me to embrace new opportunities that I may not, otherwise, have experienced. Hence, the more adaptable my attitude becomes the more accepting I can be of not only change, but perhaps along the way appreciate the joy of the journey.   

3)      Learn to seize the moment in each and every day. How? By embracing life to its fullest; and by learning to perhaps laugh a little bit more, love a little bit more, and linger a bit more with life. So often, our lives become so consumed with busyness along with “must do’s” and “have to do’s“ that we truly do forget to “stop and smell the roses.”  Yes, this is an old cliché, but rather than rushing through life, I am learning from the life-altering lessons that inevitably have and will continue to come my way. And finally…

4)      Maintain my faith.  For I have learned that faith is not achieved by one great leap, but by one step at a time. It is believing that in the darkest hours, tomorrow will bring a new dawn. It is allowing my burdens to become blessings. It is not of my own strength that I will win the battle of cancer, but by entrusting my life into God’s hands. 

Hence, when I “Choose” – “Accept” – “ Learn” – “Maintain” the forks in the road of my life, then I will be “CALM” throughout my life because I simply trust God. “For when I am afraid, I will trust in thee” (Psalm 56:3).

"Never be afraid to trust 
an unknown future
with a known God."

~ Corrie Ten Boom ~

Anxiously Patient. . .

Peace ~ Wonderful Peace - Arrangement by Dino Kartsonakis
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Oxymoron – two words or phrases with extreme opposite meaning.

It seems from almost the time we begin crawling we are taught to “Wait – Be still.” How much one spends, on average, waiting during their lifetime is debatable. However, I recently read, if a person was to live until age 70, on average, the “wait time” is two to three years.  This is approximately one hour each and every day. We “wait” for many reasons and for many occasions – at traffic lights, buying groceries, standing in line, calls to be returned, special events, doctor’s appointments, and, yes, even test results!

Waiting is, in fact, a part of our everyday life. Yet, why is it that so many of us, throughout life, seem to struggle with waiting? I sometimes have to ask myself, “Is it the waiting, itself, that makes me anxious? Or, is it the unknown of what I am waiting for that makes me impatient?”  To be honest, sometimes it is both. However, I am reminded of the scripture verse that says, "Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication (a humble plea) with thanksgiving, let your requests be known to God, and the "peace" of God, which surpasses all understanding (what comfort), will keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus" (Philippians 4:6-7). 

I cannot begin to tell you what comfort the scriptures have given me, in particular, these past three months, while waiting for ALL the various imaging and test results, not including the life-changing surgical procedure that I would ultimately have to undergo. Talk about being anxiously patient! Knowing what the initial diagnosis was, having to wait for all the test results to confirm how to proceed with the surgical route, and then when we were able to proceed with surgery was, needless to say, a very anxious and worrisome time not only for me but for my loved ones. However, at the onset of my traumatic, life-altering diagnosis, I had to accept the terms of my devastating news.  I had to be of the mindset to turn my anxieties, worries, and the fears behind my tears over to God and to truly “trust in the Lord with all my heart and lean not unto my own understanding”(Proverbs 3:5), and believing that God would care for me (1 Peter 5:7).

To continue worrying about something that was totally out of my control was not only exhausting, but was a mental burden that I just could not fathom carrying on my own. For I have come to realize that the energy it takes for me to worry robs me of the time that I could be praying for God’s strength, courage, and, most of all, patience (Colossians 1:11); knowing that whatever trials may come my way they will not only help me develop endurance, but endurance will develop strength of character, and, thankfully, character will develop a confidence of hope (Romans 5:3-4). It is only when I replace my worry with prayer, and give my hand to Jesus knowing He won’t let go, then I can truly trust and believe that all will be well with my soul because He loves me so.  

Trusting is Believing
Trusting is believing that God could care for you,
And trusting is believing just as a child would do.
It's like giving your hand to Jesus, and knowing He won't let go.
I'll trust Him because He loves me so. ~ Words by Flo Price ~

“Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow;

it empties today of its strength." ~ Corrie Ten Boom ~

 

The Big "C". . .

Somebody Bigger Than You and I - Arrangement by Elvis
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No matter how the diagnosis is presented to you the news is devastating! No one ever wants to be told they have cancer, or as it is sometimes referred to as the “Big C”.   

At first, one wants to go into denial. Yes, I know something is there but I am sure it will go away on its own. Nevertheless, when I realized the lump was not going away then I was jolted back into reality and I knew that it was time to get out of denial and jump into action!  Time was of essence here and I began to ponder, “How much time have I already lost?” Hence, I called the Ontario Breast Screening Program right away, which I had participated in before, to arrange a mammogram, even though there was NO history of breast cancer in my family (By the way, I recommend this program for all women when they turn 50!).  However, subsequent to the mammogram, I was then scheduled for further imaging and an ultrasound as requested by the radiologist. My worst fears now go on high alert, although I have yet to be officially told a diagnosis! Other than my husband knowing about these additional tests, I kept my suspicions to myself.  I fear the worst and hope for the best. I pray, “Oh God, please be with me!  Oh, God help me! Do you hear me?” And then I am reminded, “I will never leave you; nor forsake you.” (Hebrews 13:5). Clinging to this promise brings such peace knowing Christ was there to “comfort” me.

After what I thought was an exceptionally longer than normal ultrasound procedure, I was advised by the radiologist that an urgent biopsy would also be performed that same day as the ultrasound results looked ominously “suspicious.” As I attempt to absorb this distressing news, and the tears begin rolling down my cheek, it immediately brings with it emotions of uncertainty, fear, worry, and tremendous sadness. At that very moment, I knew my life had changed forever! However, with all the emotional strength inside me not to lose it, I am reminded of another promise, “God is my refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.” (Psalm 46:1).  I am so thankful that Christ was there to take “care” of me.

As the biopsy procedure is nearly finished, I worried not for myself, but for my beloved husband and our loved ones. How do I tell my husband? How do I tell our family? How do I tell my friends? How much longer can I work? How will everything get done at work that needs to be done? I have no back up! What are the next steps? How soon can I get treatment? What are my options? What is my prognosis? My mind races out of control!  Meanwhile, the radiologist, who was so very kind and compassionate, tries to reassure me to the best of her ability that I will be seen as quickly as possible by a surgeon to discuss the next steps and will discuss the results with me.  It is also during my time of distress that I am encouraged by yet another promise, “Be of good courage, and he shall strengthen your heart.” (Psalm 31:24).  Thank you Lord for your promises that you will not only “comfort” me and take “care” of me, but YOU will also give me the strength and “courage” to face whatever lies ahead.  Knowing these promises, I am so very thankful and grateful that there is "Somebody Bigger than You and I," or for that matter cancer, who is in control of my life.  For it is Christ, who is the “Big C” in my life, not cancer!  He is the one who is listening to me, comforting me, caring for me, and encouraging me to persevere each and every day knowing He is always with me, guiding me, and walking beside me!

"Casting on your care upon Him, for He careth for you." (I Peter 5:7)